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Tag Archives: United States

My Sister is Leaving Me


Me and my sister

Everyone that knows me knows that I do not like to get all mushy about my feelings and it is really rare for me to tell you how I feel.  I wanted to express to my sister, Whitney Dionne Ellis, how much I love her and of course I cannot tell her because I do not want to cry.  This is the best way I could think of to tell her and she will have a constant reminder.  This is for you sister.

Whitney,

I remember when mom brought you home.  I was so happy to have a sister.  For so long it was just me and Pumpkin, we both know how weird he is.  Seriously, we were great together but when you came I had someone just like me.  I immediately wanted to help take care of you and that’s what I did.  Every time we went anywhere you would scream your head off because you hated that car seat.  I would pick you up and hold you in my arms to get you to calm down.  (This was before they set the safety standards of course.)  I can remember dressing you and doing your hair.  As I got older you used to want to tag-a-long behind me and I hated that.  I did not understand that I was an example for you.  I promised myself that I would always take care of you.

You are a very beautiful young woman.  I am so thankful and grateful that you came to stay with me and I loved our time together.  I really appreciate your help in my time of need.  You are not just my sister but you’re my best friend.  Now that you are leaving for Indonesia with the Peace Corps, I am afraid.  You are going to be so far away, how will I be able to protect you?  I won’t be able to talk to you when I want.  Nevertheless, I am so proud of you for stepping out on faith and taking this journey in your life.  I was so supportive and excited for you when you decided to do this but know that the reality is setting in and the time is drawing near my heart is breaking.  I apologize for not being strong throughout.  I know that you will be fine and that you have an assignment to fulfill, not just with the Peace Corps.  I love you and you better Skype with me as often as you can.  I wanted to write so much more but I keep crying so I am going to stop.

Love,

Your Big Sis

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I Want to Honor Good Men


Far too often men are cast in a negative light.  I want to stop and take a moment to show my appreciation.  Not all men are “dogs”.  There are so many that are doing all they can for themselves, their family, their children, friends and their communities.

First I would like to thank my daddy.  He was never a man to show much emotion but as I look back through my life I can

My dad with my mom and his grandsons

 see the many ways he showed us he loved us.  When I was a little girl I used to swear my daddy didn’t love me when he would get on me for acting up.  I now know he disciplined me because he loved me and wanted the best for me and from me.  We were actually quite spoiled, we still are.  🙂  My dad will do all he can for his children.  Through my child eyes he was huge, my dad is 6’6″ so he really is tall.  His hands were enormous in comparison to mine or anyone else I know.  I used to tell people, “my dad can do anything”, I still think that.  There is no one like my dad.  He’s funny and patient.  My father works long and hard to provide for his family. We have PCS’d 4 times stateside and each time my father has driven my vehicle cause I don’t want to drive the long hours.  I ask and he’s there.  He’s done the same for my other siblings as well.  He’s an awesome grandpa to his four grandsons.  He spoils them too.  Thank you daddy for being the best father you know how.

Me and my hubby

My hubby, Jeremiah Evans, is the love of my life.  We’ve been married 11 years and have the greatest three boys together.  This man literally swept me off my feet, he used to carry me around base on his shoulders. lol   I have never known love like I’ve known it with him.  I almost ruined it with the baggage of my past but him being the patient man that he is, loved me through it all.  We have been through so much together, the good, the bad and the ugly.  Our relationship has truly been tested through the years.  No matter what we’ve been through we dug our heels in and worked it out.  Jeremiah is a loving and devoted man to his family.  He sacrifices so much for us and rarely complains.  I know that he would lay down his life for us without a question.  Not only does he sacrifice for his family but for his country as well.  He does his duty to protect and maintain the freedoms we have today.  He has missed two births, birthdays, anniversaries and holidays serving his country abroad.  He does what is required of him in all that he does.  He is a joy to be around and can lighten any room.  Thank you husband and father of our children for being the best man you can be against the odds.

My father-in-law, James Evans.  Oh my what an amazing man.  I got to really know my father-in-law, who I call dad,

My father-in-law and hubby with our baby boy

 when my husband was deployed.  Prior to my husband’s last deployment my dad, who never flew on a plane before, got on a plane from Virginia bound for Texas to see us for Christmas.  That meant so much to me.  While my husband was on tour my dad called everyday to check on us and we talked for hours about everything.  Dad got me through a lot of days when I was stressed and overwhelmed, missing my hubby.  He made me laugh and listened to me vent.  He always has a piece of wisdom that he ends our conversations with.  My father-in-law taught my husband how to be a man and has always been there for his children.  Thank you dad for letting me be your “baby girl” too, treating me just like your daughter.

I want to say thank you to the men that take care of their children.  The men that make sacrifices for their families, being good husbands and fathers.  Even the men that pick up the slack and take care of children that are not theirs biologically.  Working long hours and sometimes multiple jobs,  even while attending school.  The single fathers that rarely receive any admiration doing all they can.   The soldiers away from their family for a year at a time-serving their country, thank you.  The firefighters and policemen that put their lives on the line as well.   Whatever your line of work, thank you.  Your hard work does not go unseen.  THANK YOU!  I’m just saying.

Martin Luther King Guest Speaker Debacle


Last week my family and I attended a luncheon on a military installation, honoring Dr. Martin Luther King.   The guest speaker was introduced as a Harvard graduate and president of a university.  The speaker begins by saying a few things about Dr. King.  Then he expresses how “they”, a term he used to represent white people, said blacks could not accomplish much.  He continues by informing the audience that he  received his Doctorate from Harvard and out of nowhere poses the question, “you know what “they” called a black doctor?” The audience is silent wondering what is he getting at, “Doctor n-word.”  He continues talking about an incident he and a co-worker had during lunch as they  discussed the positive aspects and opportunities they were afforded since receiving their Doctorate degrees.  At the end of their lunch he states, “as if sent by God a white man walks up to them and says n-word, n-word, n-word, n-word.  And as the man walked away he looked back and said the n-word two more times.” And the speaker said from that experience he learned, “not to think too highly of yourself.”  I was flabbergasted by what I was hearing, and shook my head in disgust.

I found the speech shocking because it is not a part of everyday life. I don’t want to take away from what happened to AfricanAmericans. It is just that for children in today’s society and the military culture it is not very evident. I think it is very important that students know their history, but we have to prepare them for the requirements of their time.  I often hear that you must know where you come from to move forward. But this can be done without ignorance and purposely carrying out a stereotype.  It becomes a question of what is appropriate for private and public conversation.  If that is how the speaker chooses to speak in private, I don’t care, but publicly speaking around people’s’ children and as a representation for black people is unacceptable.  It is a frustrating situation because this man had the opportunity to be an example of a successful black person, set a standard,  and deliver a speech to transform lives as a reflection of what Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. dreamed would one day be possible.  Instead he took the opportunity to demean our white brothers and sisters along with embarrassing himself.  Dr. King was no Dr. N-word and he inspired us all to think highly of ourselves to make this nation better.  I feel guilty that I sat there for this ridiculous display.  We cannot move forward as a people when individuals like that take us back.  I’m just saying!!!

*Edited by Whitney Ellis, my amazing sister.  🙂